And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
birth control should be required to get into college
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
