My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Found your dick twin last night
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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