honey bunches of taint.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
