I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
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