question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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