But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
