Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
