matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I don't think brook has ever known best
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
