stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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