you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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