so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
