How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
