Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I would fuck him just for his dog
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
