I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
