5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
