Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
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