Just mADE A PArabola og urine
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
its liver damage thursday
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
