if you like me you must not know who I am
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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