oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
