question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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