it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
