I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
