It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
