He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I cockslap morals
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
