Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
