i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
