How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
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