so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize