my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
He passed out mid-signature
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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