Say something about gay babies.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
