So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
wat bout pragnant strippers??
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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