I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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