She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize