i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
