i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
