A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
