he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
he fucked my hip out of place.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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