do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
