was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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