Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize
