I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
