Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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