I'm laying in your front yard are you home
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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