Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
