she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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