god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
