fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
