1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
worst night to have a conscience
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
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