i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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