See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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